Over the last week and a half I have been changing my vision. It’s been a fascinating process full of contrasts, with significant gains and losses. I’m still adjusting to this new way of seeing the world, noticing colors and textures I was blind to before. But I’m no longer able to read the page in front of me without a significant correction! Some of you may have had this experience when cataracts were removed from your eyes. It’s a simple procedure, really, but for some of us it drastically changes the look and feel of the world around us. For me this past week has been a continual meditation on Light and the often-overlooked reality that it is the contrast between darkness and light that makes the experience of both so profound.
In this same week we have been squeezed through a tiny crack in our nation’s cosmic door where denial and darkness seems to have prevailed. It has been wrenching to watch, to hear, to hold a flimsy thread of hope at the same time knowing the dark forces were formidable and likely to triumph. Holding on to hope is a difficult task in these dark and seemingly darkening times. We need perspective to face the present moment in history. We need to alter our vision and remove the cloud from our lens if we are to be what Jesus calls us to be—salt of the Earth, light of the world. It isn’t enough to claim these titles here in church then go into the world leaving the Gospel behind—shaking our heads at the next proud face of darkness. Our task is to BE the Light, to BE the Salt. How do we do that when our hearts are grieving, as we watch values we hold dear trampled and see the ongoing oppression of peoples and exploitation of earth’s resources with no regard for the future of our planet? How do we stay in the game with hearts open, kind, non-judgmental, generous, honest—all the virtues of Light? Is it even possible to flavor this soup when the ingredients are so bitter and rancid? The even bigger question, though, is how do we continue believing our thoughts and actions matter, that our attitudes make a difference in the larger scheme of things? In fact, how do we believe what Jesus tells us—that we are “Salt of the Earth,” and “Light for the Nations”—except for a fleeting moment? Maybe just while we’re sitting here today?
There is a story that goes back to ancient times in the Americas, to a people who spoke of a period they named “the time of the black jaguar.” Matthew Fox highlights this legend in one of his recent Daily Meditations (1-15-20). The ancients described this as “a time of purifying chaos when lies are seen for what they are. At this confusing time…millions of humans lack clarity about their future and their true place in the world. The social pillars and belief systems of the conservative past are broken, and the new pillars are not built yet…It is the Black Jaguar who rules” and big change happens, “so that a new time of creation may arrive and find hearts that are clean and open to see and support the unfolding of a new world, still unknown.”
Clean and open hearts, supporting the unfolding of a new world—this is what being “Light” is about. It requires us to “clean” the lens of our heart so it is open and free of the cloudy film that distorts who we are and how we see. In “the time of the Black Jaguar,” Fox says, “we are invited to face evil as the lovers and warriors we truly are. It is a time to ask ourselves: What inner prisons, attitudes and ways of thinking are holding us back? What toxins reside in our minds and hearts? What cleansing do we need to undergo?” “Evil has much to teach us,” says Fox….Among other things, it can teach us about ourselves by demanding more of us—more truth, more courage, more creativity, more self criticism and self awareness. It does hold the power to purify our intentions and reason for being here. It can render us more alive and more present and more generous.” And all of this, all of it, brings more Salt and Light into the world.
Lakota teacher Buck Ghosthorse warns about FEAR. He calls it “the door that lets the evil spirits in. All authentic prayer,” he says, “is strengthening the heart so fear stays outside the door and does not enter. It is FEAR that brings evil spirits with it.” Fear is one thing; grief is another. Barbara Marx Hubbard, Carolyn Myss and Matthew Fox all encourage us to grieve. The losses we are experiencing on every front are real. Denial is a tool of what Ghosthorse and Fox call “evil.” Courage is needed now; denial is cowardice. We need the Salt of our tears. Tears cleanse hearts and minds. They clear our vision. Without them it is more difficult to step toward the future without giving into fear. Negativity lurks in that fear. It is the seedbed of violence, hatred and revenge.
Sr. Julia, a young Franciscan Sister of Perpetual Adoration writes a blog titled MessyJesusBusiness. She was featured this week in NCR’s Global Sisters Report. She says she never thought the culture of her order would change when she entered 14 years ago. But it is—dramatically—bringing grief, lots of tears, as well as a cleansing of practices no longer viable in these times. She says that, “behind all this seismic activity within the order (and in society, I might add) is Christ, the fire that burns deep within, a fire that is energetic and dynamic.” It is this fire—this radiant light of Christ—that needs to burn in us now. It will burn the waste that is our FEAR so we can see with both love and clarity.
Lent begins in two and a half weeks. We will follow Jesus to the crucifixion where darkness overtakes the land. The light inherent in that gruesome spectacle propelled Paul beyond his weakness, his fear and trepidation. It took him beyond his comfort zone as it must also take us beyond our own. It is in that dark and foreign territory we are asked to be both Salt and Light. To be up to this task many former ways of seeing need to change. Isaiah tells us to remove oppression, finger-pointing and vicious rumors from our hearts. This is the internal work. Feeding, sheltering and clothing the poor, our own “flesh and blood” is the outer work. Both are required but the inner work is, for most of us, much more difficult. The energetic, dynamic fire of Christ resides within each of our hearts burning the wastes of our fear. It’s time to clear the lens of our souls so our light can rise within the darkness of our times.
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